Altar
I set up altars everywhere I go —
polished pocket stone,
daisy, or dandelion in a pinch, shell
shaped like an ear,
a bowl of water,
comfort
I’m not religious
no no no
I say no no no
leave that in question
or alter —
Hello! I’m Sheila Stewart, a Toronto poet and educator. I’m excited to have recently launched my third poetry collection, If I Write About My Father (Ekstasis Editions). Marion and I did a headshot photo session while it was still a manuscript-in-progress and that nudged it along! The poem above is the opening poem in the collection.
This bookhelped me explore my relationship with my father, a Presbyterian minister in Northern Ireland, who joined the United Church on immigrating to Canada with my mother and brothers shortly before I was born. In it, I uncover the tensions of growing up as the minister’s only daughter in the manse in Stratford, Waterloo, and Montreal. I wrestle with questions of authority, voice, spirit, and power.
In a sense, If I Write About My Father is a companion piece to my first book, A Hat to Stop the Train, which is about my relationship with my mother, her younger life, her immigration to Canada, and her life as a minister’s wife. My second book, The Shape of the Throat, also explores family, and is rooted in Toronto, particularly High Park.
My lifelong journal writing began on childhood trips to Ireland. Later, while at university, I wrote to untangle thoughts and feelings as I studied philosophy and English and wrote a little poetry. After graduating, poetry went underground until I took a course titled Women Writing Workshop, with instructor Rhea Tregebov, at George Brown College. I so loved it that I took it again, this time with Helen Humphreys. As that class ended, my first baby was due and I wondered how I would manage to keep writing. Some of us from the class decided to form a writing group, and we began to meet monthly at each other’s homes to workshop what we had written. To this day, I continue to learn from peers in writing groups and through conversation.
Family history and photographs inspire me, while yoga and walking nourish me. I love exploring Lake Ontario’s shorelines and being near trees. I like the inquiry process of writing: a poem starts one place and often ends up somewhere unexpected. The unconscious and the rhythm of language take the writing where it needs to go.
In parallel to writing is teaching. For several years I taught English and English as a Second Language in Libya and Swaziland. I then returned to Canada and began working at the social-justice-oriented adult literacy program Parkdale Project Read. To learn more about research, I worked and studied at OISE/UT, completing a PhD at age 53 and becoming a Writing Studies professor. I still do some teaching at the New College Writing Centre, while focusing on writing and collaborative projects with other writers and artists.
Over the years, poetry has given me a way to learn about myself and the world, to dwell with inner and outer worlds. In the practice of creation, language embraces senses, body, feelings, thoughts, and surroundings. Poets grapple with language and that which is beyond it. I’m grateful that I found poetry. Poets are needed in this difficult time to help us attune to the nuance and complexity of language, to understand how it shapes the world and is shaped by it.
I can be found walking Toronto’s western beaches, in High Park or at www.sheilastewart.ca
If I Write About My Father can be found at Another Story Bookshop in Toronto, ordered from Ekstasis Editions or your local independent bookstore, or by contacting me through my website.
“I am a woman longing to be a tree, planted in the moist, dark earth
Between sunrise and sunset –
I cannot walk through all realms –
I carry a yearning I cannot bear alone in the dark –
What shall I do with all this heartache?”
From Speaking Tree by Joy Harjo